Monday, November 26, 2007

Guest Blogger #1 - Amir Hafizi

The Malay Male. Journalist Amir Hafizi's urgent need to explain his sudden disappearance from the blogosphere last August to his faithful readers prompted me to start this Guest Blogger "column". I had the pleasure of being his editor when Amir was a reporter at The Malay Mail. I think it was in 2004 when someone drew my attention to his blog and suggested that I should tell Amir to pull his blog down. The nature and content of The Malay Male, someone further suggested, was giving the Malay Mail (The Paper That Cares) a bad name.
Thanks, Amir.

Bros and sis, I give you The Malay Male:



"Fucking hell, man.

Ever since I shut down my site, most people don’t give a shit. Which is good. But some people have been asking me questions and shit.
Usually, they are of these variety:

  1. Did you get spooked by the spooks?
  2. Did the Government order you to shut down your blog?
  3. Did you stop blogging because of you new job?
  4. Will you fuck me in the ass?

And so on and so forth.
Well, I used to tell them the truth. I told them, “Nah. I just got bored.”

And then, a week later ...."
[Bru: click here for the rest of Amir's piece]

64 comments:

meesh said...

yay for amir hafizi! :) I only asked you once okay, for the record. And I wasn't even drunk. Hope the coughing stops soon. Got a shit tonne of dirty work to do Amir.


Keep it real,

m

shanghaistephen said...

rocky,
oh no......he's back !
God save us all......such profanities....as my aunt Peggy (bless her soul!) would say....."he must wash his mouth with soap" !
In all honesty ...Amir...welcome back bro, this country needs some "real" comedy....after all the shit we get from the BN government,hahaha !
Cheers !

galadriel said...

Damn I miss this guy!

Hey Amir, let's go Hokkien Mee at Press Club...or are u too "keparat" to do that these days with your Dockers?

mak ngah bedah said...

I am offended by the strings of profanities spewed by Amir. I don't mind it if it was in is own blog - but you Rocky should be more responsible enough not to pepper it in your blog.

Sure, it is YOUR blog.

Rocky's Bru said...

Mak ngah bedah,

Amir suggested that i create Rocky's Bru2 so that i could publish his Guest Blogger column without taking out the 4-letter words. The new blogsite has now become a very useful storage for bonus tracks, etc, for me.

so, the profanities aside, this bugger Amir continues to inspire for the betterment of blog-o-sphere.

Cheers.

jediraj said...

ahhh ,, rock ,,, u had to do it huh ? God bless us all ,rock,

Anonymous said...

what a moron! i've never read him before and not regretting it one bit. good riddance!

alex said...

at first i thought amir is just another typical maddoxly smack talking wannabe until the bit about opinions and how only a war is going save us all. god bless amir.

bibliobibuli said...

missed your voice in the blogosphere, amir.

Tehsin Mukhtar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kerp (Ph.D) said...

macibai, amir's back to inspire us all. THANK GOD, YOU RULE!!

Anonymous said...

Malay Male,I know what had kept you busy from writing your blog. you have been busy contributing to
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Malaysia#Cost_of_Living_In_Malaysia


Right? Right? :)

zorro said...

Most people use FUCK in anger. Only Amir puts panache into that useful active verb, the negation of which means that we are products of a virgin birth! Amir should be our independent candidate. Get him into Parliament and he can effed those vomit with vim, vigor and vitality.When is your next JD session.....and coming in your own wheels I hear. Please treat your car as a new bride....go easy for the first 50. Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears. Take her thru the rough patches carefully, roll her over gently and she will last for many years. Amen Amir.

Frank said...

The way this country is run in a shitty way by this Government, I can't see what better language to use than the way Amir uses.

Way to go, man !

When those idiots in power make life so shitty, might as well screw them with the way you know best.

constant_drama said...

Ok that was hillarious! Damn, I'm kicking myself now for not discovering his blog when it was still around.

Wasted.

Stevie said...

fucking A, man.

Anonymous said...

idk u well but dang ur so butt ugly nigga so plz dun rape my mom and shit cuz i dun wanna have to slice off ur 2 inch with a lightsaber and have u confess to me ur my fatha. hope u havin crazy glue fun wit real life and if u ever get bored wit it u know there're plenty o' peeps who'd wanna hear u bitch ver 2.0 XD

PS - u tink a 2nd may 13 incident would do dis country good? i dun wanna get shot n killed b4 getting laid wit my ex-teach's daughta!!!

hantutelur said...

thought the nightmares were gone for good...

Catwoman said...

Storage for bonus tracks? - surely Amir's inability to express himself without resorting to profanities is fit only for the dung-heap. This bugger should bugger off to another ethereal dimension .

Anonymous said...

amir, RESPECT.....Malaysia NEEDS your BRUTAL HONESTY

GOD Bless

Hussin said...

Hi Rocky,
I see Amir has his share of admirers. maybe they have known him earlier but I definitely cannot appreciate this brand of humor (if that is what it is) in the context of rocky's bru site. maybe at another place and another time...but you are the owner and you have all the right to put whatever shit you please and if we do not like it just, I guess we should just fuck off

Lipreader said...

What's so amusing about Amir's rantings? His fans probably suffer from arrested development, like him. That includes you, Rocky. He's like a kid who comes across profane words for the first time and can't help spouting them as an act of defiance and to convince others that he's a man. Everyone can do toilet humour but rare is the man who can do it without it coming out forced or fake. Vulgarity for its own sake in any piece of writing (blogs included) speaks volumes of the author. By all means use the F and C words if they fit the occasion but not when you just want people to sit up and take notice that you're a man. Grow up, Amir. And Rocky, surely there are more worthy guest bloggers than him.

Anonymous said...

Welcome back, Amir..miss ya..me love you long long time..

Klaw said...

Amir Hafizi
The Greatest Motherfucker Who Ever Fucked Your Mother


Dad???

Anonymous said...

How I miss him...why the hell did he closed down his blog?

Welcome back Amir...u sure rock!

Anonymous said...

I love Amir's pantun.He should compile it and make it into books...and sell it to mat rempits or the politicians!

misslaych- said...

haha, itsabout time.

to malaymale haters,
i don't think you get it, or will ever get it, and that's fine.
whatever.
what I want to know is,
what did you do with the g-string and bra?
welcome back bitch

Yusuf/Martin said...

It has been a very very time since it was shocking, or even clever to exhibit swearing in public. In fact not since the American comedian Lenny Bruce has it been even vaguely acceptable to gain your audience's attention in that way.

Please mature. Prove to your readers that you are articulate, not just foul mouthed, intelligent, not boorish.

Mr. Lim said...

It is dumbfounding how blogger Zorro believes that "only" Amir "puts panache" into the 4-letter word. It appears that this commenter has gotten a little carried away on heady blogshine. To strew one's blog page with assorted obscenity for effect in order to set oneself apart from the rest of the blogger's pack and thereby get a slice of attention in the blogosphere is reasonable, and that is what Amir has done. But to worship drivellingly writing that combines regular blog opinion with some acrobatic use of curse words suggests naiveté. "Panache" is a higher-order attribute reserved for the exposition of an exceptional class of style.

shar101 said...

Hahahahahahaha! Only on the blogs!

So Amir Hafizi got bored, huh.

Well, highly developed, intelligent people get bored with inanity too quickly, often enough.

The stupid ones are essentially... well.. just boring in my books.

Folks, if you had the opportunity to meet this bloke in person, I can assure you he's a real pussycat in real life and rather docile in his demeanour. That's the first impression (still is, I might add) I had of him when Rocky & Nuraina pointed him out to me and I went "No waaaay, man".

Life sucks, AH f**ks back.

*Ok, Amir. I'll probably owe you bigtime on JDs the next time we meet at the NPC if Rocky publishes this comment. And please leave the baseball bat in the car before walking in, will yer*

Eden said...

I miss Amir Hafizi's rants. Blog agin, if you have the time. M'sian blogosphere isn't the same without The Malay Male.

Ketua Krani said...

Amir you really need to censor your blogs better, I mean why did you tell them about my spaceship and Nessie, now she thinks I am telling the world about us and she won't talk to me for a week
I hate you Amir

amir said...

Hey, thanks for posting that, Rocky.

To the rest of you, in the words of Eminem:

You can suck my dick if you don't like, my shit.
I was high when I wrote this so suck, my dick!

Jantan Sundal said...

Aku dah agak, dia mesti gian nak mencarut punye....cibai betul

Anonymous said...

what is with malaysian journalists and plagiarism?

Cant you malaysian journalist try to be abit original.

amir hafizi is a plagiarist who writes and spew his opinions exactly like maddox from http://maddox.xmission.com/

only those who have not read maddox would be impressed with his toilet humour. as for me, its plain plagiarism.. malaysian journalist style.

rational thinker said...

oh my god...

the best muthaf*rker swearing blogger is back on the hood! I luv his realism. :) life is shit enough with all the stuff we have to deal with...to make change, we have to change our surrounding and ourselves.

welcome back bro!

Anonymous said...

aaahhhh....verbal abuse from the malay male....the world is a better place already....

Anonymous said...

anon ditto!

amir is a maddox wannabe

Anonymous said...

"So, in conclusion, we need a bloody motherfucking war. Bloodbath with 99% of the population gone. THEN we’ll see some change."

thanks uncle rocky for making things clear to me. i see now that this is exactly what we need for malaysia.

how do we start? lets start with the evil chinese first since they came into our country and took over the economy just like the jews.

for once, someone who makes sense. thanks for making me realise this.
rakyat malaysia. listen to amirs advice which is also endorsed by rocky since it is published here. the King doesnt care, the system is flawed with the EC being one sided.
maybe its true, we need violence to solve things. pick up arms my fellow brothers. lets rock this country!

zen non said...

hah..hah..hot..hot..

blogging is for self pleasure, man. better than the other self pleasuring method. btw..who is so ambitious to change the world today? let me think...hmm...maybe al gore did.But he did not know that the world is always and constantly changing. Who else..yeah maybe that guy that like to wear his spende outside..hypocrisy thy name is..?

mekyam said...

Klaw said:
Amir Hafizi
The Greatest Motherfucker Who Ever Fucked Your Mother


Dad???

Brilliant! :D

***

Thanks Rocky for featuring ol' Mealy Male!

Reading him is akin to having colonic irrigation - gross but also cleasing.

***

Amir dude, I know you really heart your gangstabotself, but do you realize what a rorschach inkblot you are?

Look at all the interesting reactions to you. They're quite revealing actually.

Mr. Right said...

Selepas membaca tulisan Amir yang hensem ni aku terus nak stop blogging. Sial betul, selama ini aku ingat dengan tulis kutuk kerajaan, kutuk orang itu dan ini dunia ini akan berubah. Aku ingat dengan berblog aku akan menjadikan dunia atau lebih tepat Malaysia menjadi lebih baik. Aku silap rupanya. Sebab Amir cakap kita tidak boleh. So, jom semua orang kita stop blogging. Hahahaha...

Amir ingat dengan tulis macam itu orang akan stop blogging ke? Nope. So, samalah... kita menulis bukan nak bawa perubahan pun. Bodoh...! Saje suka2...

amcek dan kehidupan said...

membaca blog amir hafizi adalah satu keperluan sewaktu aku dan rakan rakan belajar dulu. rasa lebih berilmu.

amir hafizi. dewa yang dirindui.

setakat ni, takde lagi yang boleh capai tahap dia.

Anonymous said...

i think, he contacted aids.....pheewww

zorro said...

Mr. Lim, you mean Fornicate Upon Concent (of) King, or Fly Uncle's Charlie's Kite. Amir does it like DHLawrence sans the smugness of TSEliot.

hantutelur said...

what i know, the term 'mudderfu'cka' only means 'a guy who fcuks his own mom.' amir, repent

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

hello. here's my 2 sens worth.

accusing amir of plagiarism is completely unfair for he had maddox's site clearly linked to his MalayMale back when it was operational. i think he was more inspired of maddox's stuff than anything.

there was this one asshole who actually copy and pasted amir's writings into his blogs and claimed it was his own. now thats plagiarism for you.

but then again, i doubt amir gives a shit. fuck you man, you shouldnt have stopped.

amir said...

Actually, I am not a Maddox wannabe.

I am a Tatsuya Ishida wannabe.

I also linked his site (Sinfest.net) to my old blog.

A lot of the stuff I did in The Malay Male was heavily inspired by Tat's Sinfest comic strip.

I never even heard of Maddox until six months after The malay Male had rolled off the assembly line and garnered its set of loyal readers.

Maddox doesn't allow himself to fall into holes. Holes are exactly where Tat and I roam.

We love playing in holes. We seek holes and jump in.

Yeah...

mmm...

Holes...

Oh. By the way. FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!

Anonymous said...

Amir, would you really? Fuck me in my ass.

Anonymous said...

Amir, would you really? Fuck me in my tight ass?

hantutelur said...

hey, i was amir's fan, though sometimes i thought he was devil's tool. a self-proclaimed genius and demi-god he churned out 3 masterpieces daily compared to maddox's 3 bullshit postings in a year. amir's the greatest. poor guy when he stops blogging he has only himself to fcuk.

Anonymous said...

Amir dude,
Kevin 07 won the extra 20% vote by internet information. How do you reach the young generation? listening to campaign in community halls, door to door? of course not! This is the internet age! Blogging does make a difference.

Cheers! I do miss your 'malay male'!

mak ngah bedah said...

To each his own, but Rocky your site is where I (and many others) go to for, like you said "alternative media". But with this new develoment where even your comment boxes are filled with profanities, I think you have to be more responsible and not let your emotion runs high.


I remember you kutuk NSTP and Malay Mail during the time when they were suspended because they publish some sex survey and you likened it to a smut tabloid.

Et tu, Rocky?

------------
With all due respect to Amir with his brilliant observation (which I think can still be observed minus all the vulgarities).


Mak Ngah Bedah.

Mak Nyah said...

Malay Male

Mengapa kau hilang dan lari dari ku?

Ku merindui mu, dewa kejantanan ku ...

Ayuh kita ketemu.

Lakukan pada ku ... (Do it to me ...)
Lakukan pada ku ... (Do it to me ...)

Jika anterior ku sudah membosankan, masih ada telinga dan hidung ku. ... Ah dimana yang anda suka ...

Bujang Kanowit said...

Dad, my mother wants to know if you would care to name her baby. She's due next week. And by the way, she said she wants more...I dont know what she meant by that because i'll only be 8 years old next January.


Bujang Kanowit, Sarawak, 97000 Malaysia Boleh.

suanie said...

oh man. i miss amir's blog :X

Mandeep Gill said...

i JUST found THIS blog...to find out that THAT blog is gone, when from a simple closure post got me hooked.

Can you like, come back? pretty pleeeeeeeeease? :(

Sultanah Yue said...

Amir Hafizi... DImanakah kamu?

TIADA Siapa yang tidak dapat melupakan blog malay male yang sangat lah Chauvinis dan bias terhadap kaum perempuan...

Tiada Siapa yang melupakan kekreatifan penulis bangsa malay ini lampoon'kan bangsanya sendiri :P

I miss uols...

By the way... f0r uols information; kerana ketiadaan blog kamu, Aku terus berkeputusan untuk membina blog aku sendiri.

Bye Amir... and 'F*ck you'

Anonymous said...

Amir you are funny man . but I am so sorry to say you are damn UGLY .
Should consider plastic-surgery!

manamanu said...

Maan ! you're the ugliest thing I ever did see---but shit ! I like your style dude !

Keep 'em cumming !

Roxanne said...

Well, well, Amir threw pearls at swine - so, what do you expect to find in a pig pen?

(To idiots: Shit as well!)

Mak Lang Su Timah said...

ROFL
Amir Hafizi = He's one of the guy you would find, not laughing by the word haha & such. But lol, all the time! Even in the real world. So is he just, all cyber? Or is he just "antagonist" like that in the real world, all the time?

Aaaaanyway write back laa wei. I missed out lots of your stuff ahh! WTF man?

P/S: To those who couldn't appreciate profanities & laughs, please cut us some slacks & let Amir said, "Fuck yeeeeew, faggit!"

LOL LOL

amir said...

And people ask me why I deleted my blog?

cat said...

Never read Amir before and Profanities aside...this Malay Male probably got the whole mess figured out to a T.

Enlightened being that he is...can you imagine what will happen if he had REAL time on his hands???